Hamza — See Me Because

There's so much that America can learn from the Pakistani people and so much the Pakistani people can learn from America. I've had my foot in each of these nations. In my early teens I had a huge identity crisis. I was thinking, "Should I decide if I'm Pakistani or should I decide I'm an American. I can’t be two things at once." In early adulthood, I realized I can have a common ground between both identities.There are so many kids out there who are facing the same problem, and maybe they can find inspiration from my story, knowing there's other Pakistani artists pursuing their art even though their family says that they cannot be artists.

I dream about traveling. I rode my bicycle from the East to the West Coast. What I like about traveling is that it tests my adaptability skills. Even though I'm here and I can fully adapt in the United States, that might not be true in another part of the world. Because people are different. There is a huge library of people, and everyone has something different to say. Each community has their own programs and moral stories. When you travel and you go to a foreign country, you see it in the most explicit way. It's not the same as TV.

Initially as I thought of my portrait, I was thinking about my identity which is divided in two nations. In New York I just want to be brave, out there, not afraid of anybody, and in Pakistan I want humbleness. Ultimately, the goal was to find a common place between both of them, and I realized that music and performance was one of them. The idea was that I'm playing to myself and I'm dancing to myself playing. Both parts of me, even though they're oppositely charged, are in balance together in the portrait. The photo of me with a guitar - I would describe as an American artist that lives here. The other photo is me wearing a Malang outfit: I was going back to my heritage and showing how my people, my ancestors, have expressed themselves artistically. So for me, the aim is to connect my current artistic vision with something of the past or something that I've inherited, but not necessarily knew about.

This process allowed me to think, “What am I like? What do I feel like?" It wasn't overnight that I came up with the idea for the portrait, but the pressing question of "What am I ?" and "What I am about?" It really allowed me to have that idea that I can show myself in this way and also that way, because I feel ownership of both of them.

New York City, 2023